When I get bored, sometimes I check out profiles on dating websites. Seriously, I do. It’s a weird source of entertainment when nothing else sounds interesting enough. I like to read profiles and think of how this person or that one could market themselves better (let’s face it, a dating profile is like a resume, a marketing tool). So I began coming up with a mental list of things men shouldn’t do in their dating profile so they might get better results (sorry guys, I’m not trying to pick on you).
I am not a dating expert, I am only a straight female. I won’t claim to be an authority on getting you more messages, winks, or flirts from other people on whichever site you’re on, however, I am a woman so…isn’t that authority enough?
I find myself seeing a lot of the same profile habits in men’s profiles. Gentlemen, while I applaud some of your efforts to create an engaging profile to show the ladies (or other men) who you are, some of you need a little bit of…guidance in this area.
You don’t need a Master’s in English, you don’t need to be perfect or try to be someone you’re not, but there needs to be a show of effort. If you don’t show a willingness to be open about yourself, you might get bypassed by someone you might really get along with!
So, on to the list of things men shouldn’t do in their dating profile.
Don’t leave the written part blank, or write only “If you want to get to know me, just message me.”
What this says to me is either you aren’t really serious about meeting people, or you are putting a lot of weight on the value of your profile image(s). Write something! The saying goes, “A picture is worth a thousand words,” but in this case I beg to differ. You need to write about yourself to show others who you are on the inside. Give the other person something to talk about with you.
Don’t write a list of everything that went wrong with the last few women (or men) you met or were in contact with on the website.
While it’s unfortunate things didn’t work between you and the last few individuals you were in touch with on whatever website you are on, don’t mention them. Yea, you might be irritated by lack of communication by one of them, or the fact you felt the next one played games with you, but when you announce these things on your profile it doesn’t seem very welcoming. It makes others wonder if they will be the next person mentioned on your profile if they try getting to know you and things don’t work out. It also makes it seem as if you hold grudges. You don’t want that, do you? There are more fish in the sea; don’t bother hanging on to negative feelings if things don’t go as far as you’d like them. There will be something positive around the corner.
Don’t post a picture of only your truck.
Yes, I’m sure you are proud of your Ford F-150 or your Chevy Silverado, but if you are not in the photo I am not sure why it needs to be posted. I don’t gauge someone by what they drive. Do other women do that? Your profile should feature you, not your stuff.
Don’t post a picture of only your tractor.
See above. I have spotted profiles with tractor photos. Only tractors. That only works if your name is John Deere and I am a farmer.
Don’t post photos of animals you have hunted and/or killed.
Do I need to explain why dead animals are somewhat of a repellent to the attention your profile gets? Stating in words that you love hunting or fishing is enough. There’s no need for the visuals.
Don’t post a bathroom mirror selfie.
I feel that the bathroom mirror selfie is showing us a bit too much of your bathroom. Either ask a friend to help you take a photo, or use a self timer feature on your phone camera and set your phone somewhere to take the shot.
Don’t post photos of you in a group and not label which guy you are in the picture.
There shouldn’t be confusion as to who this profile is for. It’s for you, not for your friends. I don’t believe you and your friends come as a gift set.
Don’t post an old picture of you and an ex.
It doesn’t matter if you cover her face, cut her out, whatever. Just don’t do it. It kind of sends a signal you might not be over your ex if you still have pictures of her handy. Also, it’s probably a good idea to not post a photo of you and any person who looks like they could be your partner.
Try to be creative with your dating profile and what it says about you. Give what you feel is an accurate reflection of yourself. If you need help deciding what to write, ask someone who knows you well for input. I can only speak from my own female perspective, but I think it’s important to describe your interests and personal qualities, as well as what you are looking for in another person. Be descriptive and honest. Hopefully, these tips will get your inbox more attention!
Good luck on writing or updating your dating profiles, fellas!
Do you have any “don’ts” you would like to recommend? Leave them in the comments!